Alexandra was actually born February 7, 1985 but we did not bring her home until this date.
When we were notified and asked if we wanted to be interviewed for a possible adoption, Janet and I had a moment of truth. I had the understanding that the Catholic Church would insist I annul my first marriage before we would be considered. I had a daughter by that first marriage and I refuse to get an annulment because of that. During our qualifying interview, I was surprised that Sister Mary did not insist on an annulment, she actually thought my feelings indicated that I would be a good father.
Janet had done all of the work in getting registered. I had no idea that we would be getting a baby that soon. It turns out she had answered a question on her application about minority children indicating she was also willing to adopt an Asian baby. The nun in charge of the agency told her that was highly unlikely, since Asians rarely put children up for adoption.
Lo and behold, no long after that, it appeared college kids, one from Las Vegas and the other, a Filipino girl from California, were going to have a child and they decided to put the child up for adoption. The boy’s family brought the couple to Las Vegas until the baby was born.
We will be forever grateful.
Janet had told the nun she wanted to see the baby first. The sister told her that was not allowed, but Janet insisted. The nun felt Janet was too emotional and told her that she would make an exception and let me come in to see the baby, not her. That day Janet was beside herself. A good friend of hers that worked next to her at City Hall told me later that Janet was staring at the phone all day. Thank God that was before cell phones. After seeing her for the first time, I called to tell Janet that Alexandra was the most beautiful baby I had ever seen. She was.
Not long after that, we drove downtown to pick up our new daughter. She weighed four and one-half pounds. Both of us were very nervous entering a new unknown. Janet had found a wicker convertible crib and a wicker bassinet at one of the Fashion Show department stores. We brought her home to a group of friends at waiting to celebrate the day with us. Celebrate we did, sharing that moment.
It was decided since I was a light sleeper and since I worked all day, that I would be the one to do the 3:00 am feeding. I remember those nights fondly. They gave me many hours to bond with my daughter.
I can assure anyone that wonders and may be considering adoption, the emotions and bonding that takes place adopting an infant is not any different that if Janet had given her birth. (see Adoption Video)